I am a firm believer that your spouse does not intentionally try to hurt you. And when you are hurt, often times your spouse really doesn't know how to help comfort you.

Instead of having them spin their wheels, or increase your aggravation by their misdirected efforts, have a conversation this week on exactly what your spouse can do to help comfort you in times of hurt, pain, fear, or anxiousness…………….

If your marriage is going through a rough stage, adding a baby to the equation is not the way to try and fix things.

It's actually the opposite!

Having a child will magnify any current issues that the marriage is experiencing. For example, if you are having communication issues, going through a pregnancy with increased hormones and body changes, will not make that any easier or cause communication between you and your spouse to improve.

Keep in mind that there is never a "perfect" time to start a family, but realize that having a child comes with its own stressors and doesn't resolve any current problems.

If this is where you are, don't suffer in silence alone! Join our FB community or schedule a call where we can give you some 1-on-1 guidance to help you navigate this difficult season.

Here is a question that can spark an interesting conversation. I would first say, be sure to pray and have an open posture before having this convo and hearing what your spouse says.

This is a moment for you to hear your spouse's perspective on how they see you, when it comes to your relationship with work. Use your active listening to show your spouse you hear them, and if you need to make any changes, do it for your relationship/marriage.

Some of us have jobs that we really enjoy working. While some of us drive from work, sit in traffic(often for hours), only to get home and then answer work calls or emails during your "down" time for a job that you tolerate, but can't stand. How about working on your off day? Are you guilty of doing that too? You might be considered a workaholic and are prioritizing your work over your relationship!

One thing I love about FB is that it will send me memories of pictures that I posted years ago and it instantly takes me back to that moment!

So tonight, as part of your date night, go through your pictures of when you all were dating. Reminisce on the best spots you all visited and even the dates that didn't go as planned. I'm sure you will be able to find the humor in it now :)

This we the theme has been family of origin. It is very important that you talk about this question with your significant other, fiancé, or spouse!

Ask your partner, how was affection shown in their family? Where family members encouraged to express their feelings and emotions openly? How was physical touch used?

When you think about how you were raised, can you recall memories as if you were reading a book about your life? When you get married all those experiences with the people who raised you, who you spent your childhood with...all of those relationships and experiences are a part of your family of origin story.

With outside being opened, many people are feeling the pull to travel and get out of the house! It is important to spend some time away from the day-to-day routines and take a trip somewhere so that you can only focus on connecting with each other.

If you could go anywhere in the world with your partner, where would you go? Would it be somewhere warm, snowy, or beachy?

Note - Every Tuesday we will share with you some maintenance relationship check questions so that you can identify any early symptoms that may determine if a tune up is needed for your marriage

Keep in the spirit of the wedding season, dust off your dancing shoes and turn on the song that you danced to for your wedding.

Jason and I learned how to Chicago style step for our first dance because @jota31 loves partner style dancing!

Although, we don't remember exactly how it goes, we still enjoy dancing with each other!

People often joke about marriage being like a ball and chain....heavy, hard to maneuver, and a trap. Marriage is often seen as the end of your dreams and it prevents you from doing what you want to do, but that is far from the truth!

Marriage does change your life, and it prevents you from doing a lot of things on a whim, but it also allows you to be in a relationship where you adore each other.

We often think that...because this person is my soulmate, because we have known each other for a long time, because they can finish my sentences etc., then there is no need for me to have to verbalize our needs and wants since our spouses will already know.

Hop in the car and take a romantic car ride by taking the scenic route in the countryside or maybe a drive along the beach. Make it sexy by kissing each other at each red light.

Or since gas prices are $1000/gallon, find a secluded area so that you can put those mini vans and big body SUVs to good use, by making out in the back seat!

You always want to be a place where your spouse can share anything....big or small...with you, without judgment, or a fear that this level of vulnerability and transparency would be used against them later on.

In many facets of our lives (like work, self-care, etc.), we are constantly doing some form of continuous education. It could be getting a certification, continuing your academic education, or getting a license to get a promotion or just level up your life! So why not continuing to become a better, or a more well-rounded, spouse for your marriage?

Spring is right around the corner so why not schedule to have your next pedicure....together!

Yes, men can get pedicures too! We usually get pedicures together right before going on vacation.

This is a time to relax and enjoy in this self-care together and a time to talk, or better yet, dream about your next couple trip or fun activity.

In order to know where you're going, you need to identify those things that are keeping you from being your full self.

Think about this question, is there anything that is holding you back or keeping you from being everything God has for you? Is it fear? Is it uncertainty?

There are bound to be someone in the relationship who loves to be early while the other one tends to run behind schedule, one is more organized than the other, or one spouse wants more "me time" instead of quality time with their spouse.

According to Gottman's Research, only 31% of conflicts are actually solvable. In a marriage, perpetual problems will occur because of the different personalities and lifestyles you and your spouse have. It is more important on how you navigate those differences, so that they do not create any barriers within your marriage.

Accept those differences so that you are able to maintain and increase your emotional connection and satisfaction within your relationship.

This week's date night idea is to flashback into time by curating a date night filled with things from the year you met your spouse.

Relive all the romance from when you first met, by watching the first movie you ever saw together, having the same first meal you shared, or going to the place where you all first met.

The purpose of this date is to take a trip down memory lane by reminiscing on a series of relationship "firsts" and laugh and enjoy those memories!

You can never affirm your spouse enough!

We often assume, but never really know, what it is that you do for your spouse that means the most to them.

Let's remove all of the assumptions and share exactly what it is that your husband/wife does for you, that you absolutely cannot live without.

It is these "things" that nourishes your relationship and strengthens your connection.

Maintain it and don't take it, or your spouse, for granted!

Note - Every Tuesday we will share with you some maintenance relationship check questions so that you can identify any early symptoms that may determine if a tune up is needed for your marriage.

We will admit that having kids is not as easy as it sounds and can widen the divide if your marriage/relationship is already experiencing some challenges. But we think that using the word "ruin" is way too harsh!

Kids require you to communicate differently, and more often, as well as more intentionally.